I specifically want to know why the past tense of the word 'have' is used in this phrase. In modern casual English(at least in the US), everyone says ' I should better get going' or they completely omit the word 'had' and say (and even write) 'I better get going'. I've read all posts on the internet regarding this phrase and not one single person questioned the word 'had' in this construction.
Cambridge says this but refrains from explaining the origin of the word 'had' in this phrase:
We use had better to refer to the present or the future, to talk about actions we think people should do or which are desirable in a specific situation. The verb form is always had, not have. We normally shorten it to ’d better in informal situations. It is followed by the infinitive without to:
Could someone please shed light on this?
Answer
Had better in [had better + bare infinitive] can be seen as a two-word item that functions as a modal verb, meaning essentially should or ought to. (At least in terms of traditional grammar; modern grammars likely better classify and/or describe this.)
What seem like past forms (preterites) in modals do not necessarily confer a past meaning on the infinitives they modify. An example of this is Could you help me? Although could can be used as the past tense of can, it does not indicate any sense of the past in this example.
A deep explanation as to why this is so relies on understanding the evolution of English at a fairly sophisticated level, which is beyond my knowledge.
Should better is not normally used in Standard English, or if it occurs, is probably uttered by some speakers informally and may have arisen as a sort of fusion of should and [had] better.
The following Wikipedia article, in somewhat fragmented form, addresses some of these issues, and includes a subsection specifically on had better and ought to.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_modal_verbs
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