Could you tell me what the meaning of shredding my thoughts is in the following context?
The complete phrase is
I had only a few seconds to wonder why before the needles returned, shredding my thoughts
It's included in this text:
I AWOKE WITH NEEDLES in my brain. Thousands of them, biting, blocking out everything. Then they disappeared for one dizzying moment and I got my bearings. It was morning, early; amber sunlight poured in through my bedroom window. I was standing but not on my own strength. Two hands were gripping my throat, and they’d been shaking me. The needles, that was my brain crashing into my skull. I had only a few seconds to wonder why before the needles returned, shredding my thoughts. My eyes were open but I saw only white flashes. A few sounds made it through to me. “SLUT!” “WHORE!” Then another sound. Mother. She was crying. “Stop! You’re killing her! Stop!”
Educated by Tara Westover
Answer
According to Cambridge Dictionary
to shred
to cut or tear something roughly into thin strips
It's a metaphor. She got only seconds to wonder because the pain caused by the needles didn't let she think. Her thoughts were shredded, abruptly interrupted by the pain.
EDITED due to OP's doubts - Taken from @Andrew's comment:
needles is a common metaphor to describe a severe sharp, stabbing pain. Pins would be less intense (because pins are shorter than needles). You will also see "pins and needles" to describe the sensation of something like when your foot starts to "wake up" after it "falls asleep" (from lack of blood flow)
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